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November 25 Random thoughts on a cloudy Autum dayAfter what seems like weeks of above seasonal daily temperatures and cheerfully sunny skies, this grey and quiet day has me in a rather contemplative mood. Here are some of the things rattling about in my brain, in no particular order:
Appropos for the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday, I have been, well, giving thanks. Thanks for being cancer-free for more than 5 years now. Thanks for having a loving, supportive, and delightfully odd family. Thanks for having a new job to start on Monday, Dec 1st.....my short and miserable attempt at collection calls (that story is a whole 'nother post, folks!) finally coming to a merciful end. Thanks for my my dearest companion Ginger. Thanks for all my friends, including my wide variety of buds here in Blog Land. Oh yes, and thanks for my beloved Raiders quite unexpectedly mauling the Broncos 31-10.....in Denver, no less! Woo-hoo!
I have noticed that the weird stuff labeled "cinnamon flavored" or "cherry flavored" etc, tastes absolutely NOTHING like actual cinnamon or cherries, etc. So how do we identify it as such when we consume these unnatural concoctions?
Have you noticed TV ads are getting totally surreal lately? I mean, what's with the couples in the twin bathtubs in inappropriate places in the Cialis ads? Or ads that are so obscure you can't even figure out what they're plugging, like those weird Bill Gates/ Jerry Seinfeld ads? And don't even get me going about the designer fragrance ads......!
I will probably be doing 95% of my Christmas shopping online this year. Internet merchants like Amazon.com are having sales that make scrabbling around at the mall on "Black Friday" at 4 AM soooooo passe.
The Number One lesson I learned from my dog Ginger: ALWAYS stay hopeful......you never know when you just might get a treat.
The 4th (choral) movement of the Beethoven 9th Symphony can still move me to tears.
Every time I watch the movie "Blade Runner", I can find something I've never noticed before.
I like the person I am now a whole a lot better at 50, fat and frumpy than when I was young, skinny and good-looking.
Chocolate really can bring inner peace.
I will NEVER figure out all the strange connections, obscure references and grand, weird, over-arching plan of my favorite TV obsession, LOST. My brain will implode into a black hole long before that happens. But I will have such great fun trying!
And lastly, I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving. Blessed be one and all. September 01 What I've been up to plus Cell phones make you stupid--Part II know, I know...I have been AWOL for over a month now. The thing is, when you're stuck staring at a computer screen for eight hours a day at your job, the very last thing you want to do is come home and sit in front of said computer yet again. I can go for days and not even check my email or even play my favorite Luxor or Zuma games. But really, all is well in my little corner of the desert. In fact, we have been treated for several days now to some wonderfully showy thunderstorms, complete with actual rain. Which is cool because mostly we get wind and a lot of dust blowing about rather than the wet stuff, which really pisses me off intensly since I have been making a serious effort to keep my patio clean and the front walk relatively free of leaves and dirt. Hey, I even bought this cute little planter to dress up the front door a bit:
Ain't it just the cutest ? You can change out the flowers (yes, they are fake, but they hold up rather better than the real thing in this climate) and the welcome wreaths with the seasons. I mean, really! Does anything say "Greetings!" better than a dachshund ? I think not! And there is some family drama going on as well. It's not happening to me, so I'm just going to say my brother is going through some rough times now and any and all well wishes and prayers would be much appreciated. Hang in there, Pat.Things really will get better, even though it doesn't seem that way now. And of course football! O ye gods and little fishes, how I have missed my beloved Raiders! Of course, the preseason games weren't anything to brag about. Jeez, losing to the freakin' Cardinals 34-0. That bites. Lucky that one didn't count. But still, win or lose, I love my football and I am soooooo glad the long wait is over. I will be back on duty with my Raider Reports, and I'm looking forward to the Monday night home game kick off against Denver. The Donkeys are going DOWN! Oh, and to my buddy Wally: THE BILLS ARE NEXT! Muwaahahahaha! OK, so here is what I have been mainly doing for the past 8 weeks or thereabouts: discovering that cell phones make you stupid. Yes, folks, all that scarey stuff they were saying years ago about how cell phones causing brain tumors is absolutely TRUE. I shit thee not! I have no other explaination as to why the people for whom I am supposed to be providing customer service (for a major wireless provider who shall remain anonymous) are so abysmally, benightedly and profoundly lacking in the mental capacity possessed by basic unicellular pond scum. A typical call goes something like this: Self: Hello, thank you for choosing "X", how can I help you? Mr. Customer: Uh.....why is my bill so high? Self: (after pulling up account) Well, sir, that would be because you only have a basic rate plan that includes 300 daytime miutes and I see here you used 4256 minutes, sent or recieved 681 texts, downloaded 7 ringtones and called Easter Island 16 times. Mr. C: Did not! I only downloaded 3 ringtones! And that last call to Easter Island got dropped. Self: Ok, I have just added a credit of $5.27 to your bill. That leaves a balance of $867.42. Mr. C: Well, that's better! You can't fool ME. I refuse to pay for something I didn't get. Self: Sir, I could change you to a rate plan that would better suit your needs, perhaps one with unlimited minutes, text and internet access. Mr C: Uh, how much would that cost a month? Self: About $100 plus tax and fees. Mr C: I can't afford THAT !! Self: (SIGH!) *************** So you can sort of see what I'm up against, right? Now, this job is oddly ironic because I don't even have a cell phone. I don't want one and I have been chugging along for some years now quite contentedly without one and the attendant bills and headaches. In fact, I have spewed much venom in a previous post on those rude cretins who simply MUST jabber on the phone while driving, sitting in movie theaters, or while using public restrooms. Or expect you, who are actually trying to speak with them face to face, to meekly be put on "hold" because they just HAVE to take this call. ARRGGHH! Call me a cranky old stick in the mud, but that sort of behavior just sets my teeth on edge. ANYWAY, so here I am working for a cell phone company...or at least the call center company that has their contract. And really, the job itself isn't so hard. I work 8 hours days 7 AM-4 PM M-F and I have weekends and holidays off. And I get to sit on my fat butt doing it, too. Which beats the hell out of that dungeon of a semiconductor fab with the 12 hour night shifts, no holidays off and standing on my feet the whole bloody time. Yes, I'm making a bit less money, but I'm relatively debt free and I have very simple needs. I have cut back on some things like all but basic cable (and that only because I don't want to fiddle with a converter box, rabbit ears and lousy reception in February when TV goes all digital) and I don't miss it much. I will miss the Monday night football games on ESPN -- I'm still grumpy about that being changed to a cable station, and don't get me going about the NFL network co-opting the Thursday games--, but I can watch it elsewhere or follow online or by radio. I cook for myself, pack a lunch to work and rarely eat out: I don't even order in pizza anymore. I check out library books instead of buying them. I wait until movies are available on DVD and rent them from Netflix rather than going to a theater. I was never one for having the lastest car or fashion or tech gizmo, so this is not really a big deal for me. I am making less money and I'm at least a hundred times happier. And I sleep better, too. This another reason I don't post in my blog so much. I used to be up and wide awake at 2 AM and that's when I'd usually sit at the old keyboard and blog away. Here is the bottom line: My new job is working out as well as any 9 to 5 grind ever will; I'm healthier, happier and more rested than I have been in decades; and Ginger has her Mum for more play time and walkies than ever before. Life is good. NOW....if only the Raiders have a good season.......Hmmmm.....that may be asking a bit much, but hey! It could happen.... PS: Happy Labor Day!
July 19 Going green---are we really willing to do what it takes?I've heard a lot recently about renewable resources, recycling, conservation--in short, "going green". What really cracks me up is that everyone seems to treat the subject as if it's some bright new shiny idea or something. Uh, hello......that's one of those "crazy" ideas all the much-maligned hippies, tree huggers and eco-freaks were trying to promote lo these many years ago back in the 60s and 70s. And they were sneered at as weirdos and written off as soon as the oil cartels of the mid 70s broke down and gasoline prices dropped. The "energy crisis" was declared over and Americans got back down to doing what they do best: buying more stuff and driving bigger vehicles. Woo-hoo, let's hear it for capitalism. So here we are, stuck with SUVs the size of tiger tanks and gas prices over $4 per gallon, and all those eco nut cases are beginning to take on the air of a modern day Cassandra (the prophetess in Greek mythology who was doomed to always be right but never believed....until it was too late). Now all of a sudden teensy little hybrids cars are in such demand there are waiting lists to (over) pay for them. Big Oil is making commercials that promise "Gee folks, we REALLY are putting oodles of dough into solar, wind and geothermal energy development, just be patient a while longer, so we can figure out how to properly monopolize them". Number one: is 30 freakin' years enough? I mean, think of where we would be now if the USA had led the charge into alternative energy back when the first alarm bells were sounded. Number two: the one thing that Americans hate is being told they must cut back on anything. We HATE to conserve. Left to ourselves we would use, spend, buy, and eat like drunken sailors. I have to say, however, that attitudes are ever so slowly coming around to a more rational approach. All it took was the price of fuel to skyrocket over the magical 4 dollar mark. It's good to see stepped up recycling programs for everything from plastic bottles to cell phones. I'm glad that so many animal species like the Mexican gray wolf, the California condor and the bald eagle have been saved from the brink of extinction and even reintroduced into the wild. This is a good thing. But I keep asking myself: is it too little, too late? And here's the really big question, the one question no one is asking, the one I am most assuredly going to be skewered over: why in the hell aren't we taking steps to lower human population? Because let's face it, THAT is at the heart of all the ecology problems we are now facing: there are simply too many of us. 6 BILLION and growing. And now all the developing nations want all the goodies the US and all the other industrial nations have been taking for granted, and rightly so. Why should they not want central AC, running water, good roads and vehicles to drive on them. Not to mention cell phones, TV, and Internet access. Here is an ugly truth. When the Black Death ravaged Europe in the 14th century, nearly a third of the population was wiped out in little more than a year. And as horrific as that was, the truth is that life for those who survived improved immensely. Because of labor shortages, wages rose and created the first faint stirrings of what we call the middle class today. Since there were fewer mouths to feed, food was more abundant and people became healthier and life span increased while infant mortality decreased. Fewer people mean the whole group lives better in higher standards of living. OK, I am certainly NOT advocating mass murder or genocide or even the very scary radical tactics used by China to reign in their billion-plus population. But what the heck is wrong with making part of "living green" a serious commitment to having no more than two children. Or even making it socially OK to have one or even none. To adopt or foster children to meet the need to nurture. Granted this is unlikely because: a) People seem to have this overwhelming urge to add their "special" genes to the pool (never asking whether or not they should be added) and b) our economy has been built on having a ready supply of cheap labor. But when will we see this as a sort of Ponzi scheme that is allowing us to live high off the hog at the expense of our descendants? That the concept of some sort of "steady state" economy as opposed to one being based on *GROWTH* needs to be developed? The truth is, no matter how much we conserve and cut back, it won't matter one bit if we don't roll back the human population. We will still use up and destroy faster than the Earth can heal. And folks, there is nowhere else to go. I think living lightly on the planet is great and only makes sense. Living green isn't just a cool "now" sort thing, it is the only moral way to live. But, I wonder if we are ready to follow that concept all the way. And, will it be in time? File this one under "things to ponder". Blessed be one and all. July 05 Happy (belated) Independance Day!Actually this was supposed to be posted YESTERDAY, but my ISP was being cranky and wouldn't let me log on. A pox on them! So anyway, I hope everyone's July 4th was fun. I didn't go anywhere, even though there are always some spectacular fireworks displays around town, especially at Tempe Town Lake (which is kind of weird, seeing we're living in a desert and all....it's a man-made fake lake, but it's still nice), but folks, it was HOT yesterday. It's ALWAYS hot here in July, even after sundown. And of course I'm not the biggest fan of huge crowds of sweaty people jammed up next to me. But still, I celebrated in my own way with some grilled ribs and a perfect view of the fireworks on my own TV. Call me old-fashioned, sentimemtal, or just plain corny, but watching the fireworks with marching bands playing "Stars and Stripes Forever" or the "Semper Fedelis March" or the good old "Star Spangled Banner" can move me to tears. I have not forgotten my history. I think of the sacrifices made by so many to make this country free and the greatest nation on the planet. I really am proud to be an American, even if I disagree with some of the decisions its leaders have made. The fact that I can write or speak openly about that disagreement is one of the main reasons for my pride. There's nowhere else I'd rather live.
I have some wonderful memories of Independance Day. When I was living in Long Beach CA back in the mid 1960s, we had a huge block party every July 4th. All the kids decorated bikes and wagons in red white and blue crepe paper and flags of all sizes and we had a little local parade. I dressed up as Besty Ross one year and pulled my brother dressed as Uncle Sam in an old Red Flyer wagon all festooned with streamers of red white and blue as well as a LARGE Marine Corps emblem (of course!) and we won second place for best "float". The kids also put on little skits and musical numbers and of course there was tons of great food. It was like a real small-town celebration in the middle of big-city suburbia. It was wonderful.
I also want to take this time to thank all the men and women who haved served our country and without whom Independance Day would have no meaning. God/dess bless you all! Especially my Dad, who served 23 years in the USMC, and for whom July 4th is not a happy memory because of an experience in Vietnam. It is a bitter irony that a day that should be one of pride and honor for him will be forever marred, and that his sacrifice is what is at the core of the spirit of Independance day. He is in good company. Most of our Founding Fathers suffered greatly during the Revolutionary War, losing family members to war, becoming impoverished, and suffering poor health and early death. Freedom is not free; it wasn't then and it isn't now. So I feel humbled and teary-eyed when I see those fireworks, because I will never forget what made those celebrations possible. We are the home of the free because of the brave. Blessed be one and all!
June 27 Homebody stuffNothing much shaking on my end of the space-time continuum these days. I start training at my new job on Monday, which has left me with the very conflicted emotions of "hey that's really cool and I'm all raring to go" and "oh crap, I dread going back to the dreary grind". Of course, the desire for food and living indoors under the blessings of central AC will win out, but still, why waste the opportunity for a good whine. But I still have the weekend to laze around and hang out by the pool half the day. I have been reading a book my Mum sent me for my birthday called "The Time Traveler's Wife" and it's perfect pool reading material: a rather unusual romance about a man who jumps forward in time at random intervals and his relationship with the woman who loves him. Talk about your long-distance romances! It's rather like the marriages between old time sailors and their wives; a whole lot of waiting around for hubby to return. I really enjoy it so far; I'll update later. Anyway, I'm still puttering around with various home projects. I have started growing some herbs in pots indoors; it's just too bloody hot outside, even in the shade on the patio. I've got some oregano, cilantro, basil, rosemary and cayenne peppers so far. I'm looking forward to cooking with them. Well, maybe not the cooking part, but most definitely the eating part for sure. I have been doing some grilling and trying out new marinades nd rubs for chicken and pork ribs and such. I found that I can cook up a big batch of chicken thighs or chops or burgers and freeze some for later when I'm too whacked to cook. I've also found that I'm getting picky about stuff I eat: fast food and pre-packaged crap is not only too damn expensive, it tastes like cardboard at best and cat-box droppings mostly. Not that my own cooking is that great. If some one were to cook for me I would be in heaven, but Ginger absolutely refuses to do anything remotely resembling work, the little diva. And since my Mum lives in Kansas with my sister and would rather be staked over an anthill than cook anyway, I guess what I need is a wife, ha ha! I've had a husband, not to mention numerous informal liaisons, and I'm here to tell you, as far as cooking and housework goes: forget about it! Utterly worthless. So I need a wife. But I guess that's not happening, so I'm stuck fending for myself. But still, I find doing some small project gives a certain satisfaction that is hard to quantify. I reorganized some shelves with CDs and DVDs and dusted and weeded out my collection of audio/visual goodies and set aside a fair amount for donation or trade. That was so much fun, I did a book shelf too. OK, so three shelves isn't much, but it sure felt good. Looks a lot less cluttered too. And I find I'm beginning to hate clutter: clutter means more dusting, dammit! Minimalism is my new mantra. Less clutter, less mess, less STUFF. Goddess, am I sounding like an old fuddy or what? I find I prefer gifts that involve services or practical things like a gift card to Lowes and the like. It's official. I have well and truly entered, well, maybe not my dotage, but at least a rather cranky and settled third quarter-century. Oh, dear....I have turned into my parents! SIGH! June 02 A quick check inI've been kind of busy the last few days; it seems I may have a new job lined up as a CSR with Sprint, dealing with accounts and such. Since my blogging may just get even more sporadic than it is already, I have elected to just hit a few of the high points of the whirlwind of weirdness spinning around in my brain. First off, I have no IDEA how to begin commenting on all the stuff that happened in the LOST season finale. Information overload! But still: Locke was the guy in the coffin. That was my original idea when I first saw LAST season's finale, but I changed my mind when I saw Michael was coming back to the show. I should have stuck to my original theory. Des and Penny got reunited and it was sweet. I always liked their little love story as opposed to the mess with Jack and Kate The Skank. Sadly, I was right about Jin.....or at least I think I am. I don't see how anyone could have survived the freighter blowing all to hell like that. I am NOT sorry to see Michael go....thus always to traitors, I say! And Walt! That kid is HUGE! No wonder they had to shove him to the background for the last two years. Anyway, there are still lots of open questions and secrets to be revealed on our favorite Island from Planet Weird. It will a very long eight months.
The weather has warmed up to pretty much normal for this time of year (the low 100's with single-digit humidity) and I'm getting in a bit of pool time. They resurfaced the whole pool last year and fixed the heater and pump in the jacuzzi and got new lounge furniture. It's good to see my homeowner's dues money at work for a good cause. I plan to spend my days after work paddling about, which is the only exercise I can really do this time of year outside without risking a heat stroke. And of course sitting around under the poolside ramada (nobody in their right mind sits out in the sun for long here) reading trashy novels and listening to Mozart or Vivaldi. I will have to take Ginger for walks after sunset or very early, but even she slows down a bit when the heat gets to scorching out here.
I'm still trying to learn Egyptian hieroglyphic writing, but I'm at the frustrating stage where I can only make out about 25% of what is written. Still, I admit I like to show off by reading the names of pharaohs, which is fairly easy because as I may have mentioned, they tend to use the same phrases and epithets over and over. I have no idea why I want to do this. It just seems a cool thing to know and be able to do.
I'm working on Myst IV: Revelation when I feel like diddling with puzzles. So far, I think I liked Myst III: Exile a little better (the cut scene with the wild roller coaster-type ride is the best I've ever seen!), and NOTHING has been harder than Riven so far. Still, lots fun in a surreally beautiful environment, and the puzzles keep the old brain cells at least mildly active.
In short, I'm doing typical summer stuff. I hope yours is going as well. Blessed be one and all. April 07 Some family dramaHey, I'm finally back again it seems. I really have had a great deal on my mind lately and I just haven't felt much like wrting. But anyaway, here's the skinny: Number one-- Dad had some minor surgery to repair a hernia. Unpleasant, but not too serious. Not only did he come through with flying colors, he seems to have recovered in record time as well. My brother Pat took the day off and brought Dad to the hospital and waited until it was all over and Dad was safely tucked into his room for the night. Pat said the Dad was wide awake and chatting up the nurses when he came in the hosptal room. Figures. Dad is one healthy guy and the last time he had surgery, my brother wasn't even born yet. Dad came home the next day, and was doing so well that the surgical drain he had was removed a couple of days early. By the time I came over to visit, he was refusing any help I offered (AS USUAL!) and was pretty much his same old crusty self. And that's it for my good news.
The thing that has been really getting to me is some bad news about my sister Lisa's doggy-kid Osric. He's the black and tan longhaired dachshund in the pics I posted last year playing grab-ass with Ginger. Lisa noticed that he was off his kibble (which is a VERY bad sign for a dachshund) and that, not only was he very wobbly on his feet, he was pulling to the left so badly that after a while all he could do was walk in a circle. Well, off to the vet's for tests and an MRI. They found a large lesion on his brain and did a needle biopsy. After the biopsy results came back, it was still uncertain whether it's cancer or not and and the damn thing seems to have eaten into his skull to a great extent. In short, they're not sure if it's operable or not and even if it is the long-term prognosis is very iffy. Poor Lisa! She (and my Mum too) have been devastated. I mean, Lisa is an air traffic controller and makes plenty of money, but there may just be nothing that can be done. I'm going to ask all my critter-loving buds out there in Blog Land to please say a prayer for Osric and his human family as well. We could use any and all well-wishes. Listen, I'm going to get all weepy and mushy if I write more, so I'm going sign off for now. I'll be updating as I get more info. Blessed be to one and all and especially to dear sweet Osric. March 21 Spring has sprungBut anyway! Spring! Love it! Except for that birthday creeping up on me in three weeks. 50 for pity's sake! How in the many names of the Goddess did I get that old? In my head I'm still a sweet young thing of ever-indeterminate age. But the mirror tells me a sadder tale. Oh, well, getting old is definitely better than the alternative, so I better just quit my bitching and be thankful. It's just that those zero-digit birthdays (especially that HALF CENTURY mark!) are somehow a bit unsettling. And there I go complaining again when all I meant to do was give thanks and mark Ostara. And once again wonder how the most holy of Christian holidays got named for a pagan goddess and is commonly celebrated with all kinds of fertility symbols like rabbits and eggs. We do have kind of a mixed up sort of culture, don't we? But perhaps that's what makes it so wonderfully rich and complex.
So with that I will leave you for the nonce and promise to be back much sooner with some news and views. Until then, blessed be one and all. December 31 Yikes! 2008 already?I just can't believe it's time for the old calendar to roll over once again. 2008? Sheesh, I still haven't got my brain completely wrapped around that whole 2000+ thing yet. I suppose I could see 2007 as a transitional year for me. I left The Dungeon and 29 years of misery therein behind. I did a whole bunch of house cleaning, both literally and mentally. I let go of some old hurts and learned to laugh at them. This was the year I finally stopped thinking about my cancer each and every day; in fact sometimes a week or two will go by without a single thought or worry if it will come back. This year I accepted that I will never meet the "man of my dreams" (if such a beastie actually exists) and learned to revel in my freedom and self sufficiency. Yeah, I've been talking that game for a while now, but this year I think I really believe it, and rather relish it as well. I AM NOT a failure because I am single! Woo-Hoo!
Anyway, enough of my self-centered drivel for now. I want to wish all my buddies out there in Blog Land a very happy New Year and to wish one and all love and prosperity. Blessed be, Y'all! November 22 So much for which to give thanksI truly love Thanksgiving. It really isn't about anything else than enjoying family and friends, and oh yes! watching football. A short and sweet respite before the all-out assault on the senses by the Christmas buying frenzy. My family gets together (this year at my brother's place) eat until our pants bust, all talk at once and play board games, not necessarily in that order. A good time is had by all, and I think again how blessed I am in my family, as well as my life in general. So I thought I would make a list of other things, in no particular order, for which I am grateful:
I GIVE THANKS FOR/THAT:
I live in warm and sunny AZ instead of where I would be shoveling snow up to my arse.
I'm not a Miami Dolphins fan
I've survived cancer another year
I'm mommy to the sweetest, cutest dog on the planet
I've conquered "Luxor" AND "Luxor: Amun Rising"
I have a weird and warped sense of humor that has got me through many a difficult time
The Internet and the joys of online shopping (as opposed to slogging my way through the crowds at the mall)
I have some very cool blog buddies (You know who you are!)
My 8 year old truck still runs like a champ
Sunsets out on my patio
The Mozart symphony #40 in g-minor
Trips to the dog park with Ginger
I had the guts to leave a miserable crappy job that I suffered for 29 long years
Fuzzy slippers to keep my feet toasty
Melville's "Moby Dick"
And a whole buch of other stuff too numerous to mention
So Happy Thanksgiving to one and all and blessed be.
September 20 Workin' for a livingHere's a funny thing. It's been a couple of months since I left my enslavement to my Dark Masters and quit The Dungeon for good. I had worked there so damn long and I had no idea how good it would feel to be out of there. I had pretty much forgotton what a good night's sleep was like. I had no idea I could even try to do something else after all those years. Now, I haven't found my dream job yet. Right now I'm working a temporary job which, although pays OK, won't last too much longer. Which is actually all right by me because it's boring enough to put a tweaker to sleep. The thing is, I just can't figure out why I didn't make the change sooner.
I guess we get it into our heads that a thing is, was, and ever will be and never question it. We get too comfortable or too afraid. In the end, we lose some essential part of ourselves. We stop trying and caring. We die on the inside.
Of course I can't blame my cancer on my job, not with my family history. But it's symbolic somehow. That damn place was quite literally eating away at me and all I ever did was give it more to feed on. But I kicked cancer's ass, now, didn't I? And so why not start a new career direction? Hey, I may be almost 50 but I'm not dead yet, thank you very much. So I find myself looking forward to every day in a way I haven't in so very long. And sleeping ever so much better to boot. Life is good, even when (maybe especially when) things are not so certain as to be carved in stone. Blessed be one and all. August 28 Lunar EclipseI just happened to be up and rattling around at this ungodly hour of the morning (probably because it's too bloody hot to be puttering about during the day) and while taking the trash out I recieved an unexpected treat: I looked up at the lovely full moon and noticed the shadow of an eclipse on it. Now that sure sends me down Memory Lane. I have had a completely fascination with all things spacey since I was a kid. And I sure grew up during an exciting time for it: I remember being glued to the TV watching Apollo 11 and Armstrong and Aldrin walking on the moon. When I was in high school, all the amazing Voyager pictures of Jupiter and its moons and later Saturn and Uranus and Neptune. I watched as comet Shoemaker-Levi 9 plowed into Jupiter in 1995.
And I remember watching my first lunar ecplipse when I was 12. My sister had recieved a telescope for Christmas, so whenever the night was clear (which wasn't often in coastal North Carolina) we were out checking out the sky. We saw how Venus goes through phases like the moon and Saturn's rings and the four large moons of Jupiter. It wasn't the most powerful telescope; probably not too much stronger than a good pair of binoculars, but still it opened a whole new world for me. A whole cosmos, actually. Anyway, we heard there was going to be a lunar eclipse one night. I'm not sure of the date but it was in the middle of winter because it was cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey standing out there at around 1 AM. I recall setting my alarm and then waking Lisa up and we bundled up and hauled the telescope out behind the house and watched the Earth's shadow slowly crawl across the moon's surface. It doesn't go completely dark, it has a reddish orangey sort of hue because of light diffraction. Lisa and I watched nearly all of it, shivering our butts off the whole time. It was glorious.
As I write this, this eclipse is just about at totality. I was standing out there in the quiet very hot (it's still 86 degrees, dammit!) night and feeling the awe and wonder all over again, just like the first time. We live in an amazing universe, don't we? July 13 Is it Fall yet??I think I'm going to have to add a new catagory to my little blog world: Whining. I haven't felt like doing much of anything else lately. It's too hot to think or even to breathe, for that matter. All I do is pretty much the bare minimum I can to get through the day, and then collapse and maybe, if I'm not too drained, go to the pool and paddle about for a while. As for blogging on a regular basis, it's not happening, folks. Sorry. From May until late September, this is my brain Arizona heat: totally empty. Last night at 1 AM, it was still 93 out there. And although, technically speaking, our yearly monsoon has arrived (according to dewpoint temps), we have yet to see a drop of rain. I heard a bit of thunder a week or so ago, but it was all tease. Lots of dust blowing around near sunset, but th-th-th-that's all, Folks. So I'm sitting here whining and not much else.
It just seems to be a waiting game: waiting for August and football preseason ("How long, O Lord?"), waiting for some new stuff on the telly (good grief, how many repeats of Law and Order, ER, CSI: Whatever, or utterly crappy "reality" shows can the mind endure?) waiting for some bloody RAIN fer chrissakes. The one and only good thing seems to be that my normally ravenous apetite for bad food seems to have evaporated for the moment, at least. When it's this hot, as long as there is plenty of iced tea on the fridge I'm happy. I've been living on cold sandwiches and fruit mainly. Now, I did make an exception for my brother's BBQ goodies last weekend (steak, potatoes and corn, all grilled to perfection), but as I've said before, Pat is the God of the Grill; He Who I Am Not Worthy To Scour His Spatula. Damn straight I gobbled that good stuff down. And of course, I didn't have to cook, which is always a plus.
Anyway, I'm still here, still cranky, still impatient to see how beloved Raiders will do THIS season, still waiting to do a naked raindance, or perhaps not really the naked part, but a definitely a joyous boogy when the blessed event finally occurs. In the meantime, be glad you live almost anywhwere but here and blessed be one and all. June 17 Just don't give me that "dry heat" crap!Well, I suppose it's time for my annual bitch-and-moan about the weather. It's hot. And dry. And DUH!, that's pretty much typical for the Sonoran Desert here. Hence the handy term "desert". But folks, I'm hear to tell you, dry heat is still heat, especially when it approaches blast furnace levels like it has here for the last few days. Try 109, 110, with 111 expected by mid week. Just going out to the mailbox and back makes me feel like a wet rag when I finally get back into the blessings of AC. But as I always say, I can't complain: after all I chose to live here. Well, actually I DO complain, but only once a year or so. I'm due that much whining at least.
Ah yes, The Valley of the Sun is what the local tourist industry calls the greater Phoenix area. Sounds so cheery, doesn't it? So innocuous. Like, oh yes let's all dance and frolic, plucking daffodils and chasing butterflies in The Valley of the Sun! Ha! Try that and you'll drop of heat exhaustion in three seconds flat. No, the only way to deal with this sort of weather is to hide in air-conditioned house/work/shopping mall, only poking your nose out to scurry to an air-conditioned vehicle or perhaps to the nearest swimming pool. And lordy, do we have oodles of pools here in the Valley-of-the-Freakin'-Sun! When you fly into Sky Harbour airport, you can see below you all these myriads of turquoise blue dots; those are all the backyard pools.
It gets so hot here the asphalt turns to the consistancy of peanut butter. The temperature in a parked car can rise to levels that could cook a steak. The UV level is so high that a basic pale-skinned person like Yours Truely can start to show sunburn in fifteen minutes or less. Arizona has one of the highest rates of skin cancer in the world.
And yet, all in all, I'm rather fond of my little desert paradise. We can barbeque year round, watch truely glorious sunsets, and best of all: we DO NOT have to dig our asses out of snow for months on end. I think eight months of summer is certainly worth the no snow thing.
Do I miss the cool crisp fall days with leaves changing color? A little. Do I regret having a spring that lasts all of about four days before careening headlong into full-blown blazing summer heat? Sure. And let's face it, decorating the cactus at Christmas time is just plain weird. But truth be told, there isn't anywhere else I'd rather be. Be it ever so bloody hot, there's no place like home. April 17 Oh Crap, Another Birthday......Well folks, the dreaded birthday has rolled around again. And this year makes 49, just one away from the half-century mark. Crikey, how in the heck did I ever get to be this old, or should I say middle-aged? I'm not quite ready to concede "old" yet. I may never admit to old. But here I am, cursed by the Wicked Witch of Menopause, even though on the inside I'm kicking and screaming about not being actually "old" or even middled-aged, dammit! I prefer to be considered "vintage". Now that has a nicer ring to it, doesn't it? Rather like fine wine or a 1965 Corvette fastback. So vintage I shall be. Even though no one out there is buying that for a minute.....SIGH!
Having a April birthday is kinda weird, too. April is not a lucky month. Consider:
April 15th is Tax Day.
President Abraham Lincoln was assassinated April 14th, 1865.
The Titanic sunk on April 15th, 1912.
The ill-fated Apollo 13 mission blasted off on April 11th, 1970.
The failed Bay of Pigs invasion was on April 17th, 1961.
The botched assault on the Branch Davidians in Waco was April 19, 1993.
The Oklahoma City bombing was Apil 19, 1995.
The horrific school shootings in Columbine was on April 20th, 1999.
And last but not least, the deadliest mass shooting to date just occured yesterday, April 16th, at Virginia Tech.
Crappy track record for what should be a beuatiful Spring month, wouldn't you say? Oh and how about this, I share a birthday with the likes of Nikita Khrushchev and Victoria (Posh Spice) Beckham (the horror....the horror...). Ok, so there are a few semi-cool people who have April 17th as a birthday: Thornton Wilder, Harry Reasoner, Carl Sagan, Jan Hammer, and actor Sean Bean (who is kinda hot, even though he always plays the Bad Guy).
Anyway, I suppose I should look at my birthday as one of those Cycle of Life things, and actually I do, mostly. And my family, as always, make this a happy day for me. I had my family party Sunday because of work schedules and a good time was had by all. My brother grilled burgers, my dear sister-in-law poured me several delightfully potent cocktails and my Dad beat us all at Yahtzee. Not to mention the HUGE package my sister and my Mum sent, loaded with very cool loot. So screw the whole April bad luck thing. I am blessed with such pleasures of the simple and wonderous kind. Of such is the Kingdom of Heaven...... April 14 I love the smell of weed in the morning.....Folks, the strangest thing happened to me last night. Against all odds, it actually rained after blowing up a storm all afternoon. Jeez, we had sustained winds of 25 mph and gusts over 40 mph. Holy shit, I may as well be in uh, Wichita! (Wink, wink, Sis!) Usually all we get is a dusty mess all over the patio, but last night brought a much needed gentle soaking rain. Which will of course turn the dust on the patio to mud, but still! Rain is such a rare visitor in these parts I'll gladly clean up the mud later. Ok, maybe not gladly, but the rain is nice. So! I decided to unwind after chaining myself to my desk all day sorting through all the paperwork I need to do my taxes. Yes, yes, I'm running late again with the tax thing, and I have absolutely no excuse at all. My sister got me Turbo Tax software in January, but I just plain blew it off until now. Um, how did I manage to lose my point this early in my post? ANYWAY.....I thought that a perfectly silly and politically incorrect movie might be in order so I warm up the DVD player and sit down for a giggle with "Harold and Kumar go to White Castle" (I reviewed that one awhile back....it's a hoot). And then the funny thing happened that I mentioned before......I started to well, uh, wish I had some of the green stuff myself. Aw hell, I may as well just say it: I WANTED TO GET HIGH. Folks, I haven't had any of the wacky tobacky in ages (OK, maybe a little that a friend gave me when I was doing chemo, but that doesn't count. That was medicine.) and I haven't really thought about it much, but last night I had a major urge to get silly and sit on my patio and watch the rain and not notice that I was getting soaked and my feet were freezing.
Now, I have no moral issues with using marijuana. It's just that I'm too old to get busted and spend the night in jail with puking drunks, a couple of gangsta bitches, and some freak in the corner who may or may not actually be a woman. I think it's stupid that as long as I'm over 21, I can get blitzed on booze until my liver rots, but get caught with just one joint and all of a sudden you're a drug addicted menace to society. With much grumbling about the inequality of justice and sighing about Big Brother meddling in what should be a person's private choice, I bow to the heavy hand of The Law (which is under the control of a bunch of facist loonies, I dare say) and just say NO. At least out loud. Under my breath I'm mumbling something unprintable, but that's niether here nor there. The upshot was that I decided the risks of getting stoned now and again far outweighed the joys of being wasted off my ass. So I quit and moved on.
But still! Every once in a while I miss sitting around with my friends and passing the bong and talking about absolutely nothing for hours on end; convinced of course, that we were solving the problems of the cosmos. And realizing that nobody delivers pizza at 2:30 AM and wondering where did the time go. And raiding the cupboards for anything that would take care of the severe munchie attack: popcorn, Frosted Flakes, leftover meatloaf....man, we were like marabunta ants, devouring all in our path to Munchie Nirvana. So I can really relate to the White Castle thing, except the concept of actually driving somewhere, like in a car or something, would have been totally beyond my level of motivation, not to mention my eye-hand coordination. Hey, that's why they invented delivery, right?
The truth is, I finally decided it wasn't a good thing to waste whole nights lying around doing basically nothing. All the extra calories consumed weren't so hot either. I just sort of outgrew the whole thing. Ah, but sometimes.......sometimes I would really like to spark up a doobie and put on the headphones and listen to "Dark Side of the Moon" or Emerson, Lake and Palmer's "Tarkus" and just float.....Or maybe go out on a rainy night and dance in the dark...... April 07 Brain Vapor-lock again.....I started a post about some of my experiences with chemo etc., but a funny thing happened. I wrote a few paragraphs and then I found it seemed harder and harder to keep going. And the post itself was full of my usual sparkling wit, and not a downer at all, but still. My brain just doesn't seem to want go there now. I suppose I still have feelings about the whole experience that are a bit deeper than I first thought. I've saved the post as draft, and I will finish it eventually, but I guess now is not the time. So how about this for something cheery: JURY DUTY! Yes, folks, Yours Truly has been called to report for jury duty next month. I'll probably just end up sitting around the court building all bloody day, because once the defense attorneys discover I have more intelligence than a sea sponge, I'm toast. They will use one of the peremptory strikes to keep my fat ass off that jury. "Uh Your Honor, we're booting juror # 4 because we know she will never buy our lame-ass fairy-tale defense". Or something to that effect.
Actually the prosecution isn't much better, because they will want to boot me because my politics are not somewhere to the right of Attila the Hun, and because I think we should actually have a trial before we take the dude out and string him up. So either way, I'm not juror material. But hey, I'll go down there and screw off all day reading while my Job pays for it. I'm down with that.
Oh, but here's a funny one: the court ever-so-nicely provides a bus pass to downtown, but get this: it's a one way pass! Jeez, that's what I want to do! Go downtown and after I'm there I have no way home! What am I supposed to so, ask one of the winos hanging around outside the courthouse bumming change for a lift? Hey, I'm all for conserving energy and all that, but that's just plain silly. My Dad says they give you another pass at the end of the day, but I remain unconvinced. But on the other hand, finding a parking place in downtown Phoenix on a weekday is roughly equivalent to trying to find the Lost Ark of the Covenant. Good luck, sucker!
AND if you find said elusive parking place, it will cost you. Probably a body part, or something in the low six figures, at least.
We shall see how this goes. If nothing else, it will probably make for an interesting blog post. Stay tuned for the thrilling tale of how Sharon does her duty as a citizen..... March 30 A few changes....I decided to change my display photo, at least for now, to a very cute picture of Ginger. I'll get one of the real me up there as soon as I take one I don't hate too much. And as for the name of my space changing, well, that might be temporary as well, but it will do for now. I'm just trying things on to see how they fit. If any of my loyal readers (oh the very few....you know who you are!) care to make any suggestions, well hey, by all means do so. I would welcome the input.
In the mean time, I'm going to go out and do a bit of blog-hopping and maybe meet a new friend or two. I'll pontificate later, if it's OK with y'all......Blessed Be to one and all. March 28 Why I identify with the Goddess SekhmetIsn't it funny how just a simple throw-away sort of comment can lead us down a long and dense thought trail? One of my blog buddies, Adrian (go visit his space...lots of interesting and thoughtful stuff, as well as some very cool Native American art) asked for a picture or two of yours truly, because all he had seen was my Sekhmet image that I use for my personal icon. I realized that I don't have any pics of me personally here, and I suppose that was sort of accidentally-on-purpose, if you know what I mean. My family and friends were concerned about cyber-weirdos harassing me, so at first I said very little about me personally on my blog. But as time went on, I found that the truth, as it usually as, is my greatest ally. Everything I have written here is absolutely true (or at least as I see, or saw, truth at the time I wrote it), although there are plenty of things I have chosen not to share. And the fact that I really am almost 49 years old, live a hum-drum life in Chandler AZ working at the same job I've had for 29 years, and am admittedly quite overweight and live alone with my dog (and am very content to continue to do so), well I think I'm fairly safe from horny Internet freaks looking to hook up, don't you?
And what has all this drivel to do with the Goddess Sekhmet, you ask? Good grief, if you're reading this you surely ought to know by now I do love my long-winded tales, so bear with me, OK? Anyway, when I set up this blog nearly two years ago, I was only a year past going through a whole lot of nastiness fighting breast cancer (I have been a survivor now for four years). Yep, had a lumpectomy, followed by chemo and and radiation. Lotsa fun, let me tell you! And this may be old news to some of the folks who have been visiting my humble spot here in blog-land, so if you want to hear chemo stories, ask me later. Actually some of them are quite funny, or at least I chose to see them as funny, which is probably why I'm still here today digressing terribly from my point. What point? OH CRAP, I LOST MY POINT! Does that make me pointless?
Let's try this again. Sekhmet, whose name means "The Powerful One", was the ancient Egyptian goddess of war and plagues and was represented by a woman with the head of a lioness wearing the solar disk on her head, which also associated her with the sun in its burning and destructive aspects. But, as with so many other deities, she had a flip side that also had her using her power to protect and to heal. In fact, the temple priests of Sekhmet were believed to be the the most skilled healers in known world. The Pharaoh Thutmosis III built huge numbers of statues of Sekhmet, and archaeologists believe it was was because either he, or the perhaps even the entire kingdom, were cured of a deadly plague. So one can see Sekhmet as one who destroys in order to bring about healing and regeneration, rather like the Hawaiian volcano goddess Pele or the Hindu goddess Kali.
Now, a few years back, I had been to see a display of ancient Egyptian artifacts at the Phoenix Art Museum. I had always been very interested in this culture, and the whole exhibit just blew me away. Stunning art, jewelry, a granite sarcophagus that was so precisely engineered that you couldn't slip a piece of paper between lid and bottom; all kinds of wonderful things. But what tended to draw me most was a rather large statue of Sekhmet. I could almost feel her power. This was at least five years before my cancer treatments, but when the time came, I had a powerful image to use as a totem and guide in the form of Sekhmet. I absolutely believe my Goddess sent me this experience at the museum for me to draw on when I was in need. And what better image to choose than Sekhmet, whose power destoys in order to heal. And that, gentle readers, is pretty much the whole chemo and radiation thing all in a nutshell. So that's where my mind was at when I set up this blog in 2005.
But, ya know, things change. And perhaps it is time to move past my Sekhmet phase. Not that I would ever cease to be grateful for Her help. Not that She is not there there inside me, if I should ever need to draw on Her strength again. But I really am not in that place now. So I'm thinking that some changes are due on this blog. Oh don't worry, I intend to keep this address, and of course my ever-witty commentary on a dizzying variety of this and that, but a new title and some other tweaks and additions are definitely on the way. I have to think on it. Stay tuned.
So after lots of meandering, I finally reach the end of this most convoluted thought trail. I don't think I need to "hide" (if hiding was really what I was doing-I'm still considering that one) behind my Sekhmet image now. It's time for a different "me" image to be seen. Hell, I may even put up a few pics of me. And if that doesn't scare away the cyber-loonies, nothing will, har har!
March 17 Top O' The Mornin' To Ye
Hey, I'm in a mighty GREEN mood today, although here in my desert paradise green has been in rather short supply these days. We seem to have jumped straight from the semi-chilly weather that passes for winter here smack into summer. Folks, it was 99 degrees F here yesterday, breaking all the records and we're expecting 100 today. What the hell happened to spring?? It seems we're going to skip all the niceties of perfect 75 degree days and gentle rain and go right into blast furnace mode. Just what we need here: another year to add to our 10 year drought. Oh GOODY! But It could be worse. The east coast is getting blasted with a truely wicked late winter snow storm that has the airports closed and a general mess from Maryland to Maine. If that's your home, it sure does suck to be you! So I'll despense with my whining for now and show you what I bought on impulse a couple of days ago: a little pot of real honest-to-begorrah shamrocks. So what do you think? Cute, huh? (See the attatched photo below. I've tried adding the picture here 3 times, but Fileden sees to be not cooperating.) I had no idea they had little flowers on them, and no, none of them have four leaves. But still! I could not resist. However, shamrocks are native to well, Ireland where there is lots of rain and cool weather. See above for description of where I live. Probably not compatable. But I will give it a try and keep the little dear alive as long as I can. Maybe if it stays indoors. Wish me some Irish luck on that, OK? I was going to write a whole bunch o' blarney aout the historical St. Patrick, but you kwow what? I just don't feel like being all pedantic today. Maybe next year. In the mean time, good luck and blessed be to all, and stay away from that green beer! |
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